Wednesday, September 28, 2011


Tonight I cannot think of anything to write.  It was a good day -- the same old, same old only a bit better.  Great class (made up of 11 boys!)  A mediation practice that went really well (after some hard talk two days ago about not being prepared).  Two solidly productive meetings with my colleagues.  Retreat planning at church.  An unexpected phone call.  It was a fine day, no bumps or hiccups, but I am pretty sure that nothing about this day will stand out. Seven year from now, I will have no idea what happened on September 28th, 2011.

Not having anything to write, I just closed my eyes and scrolled around in my iPhoto collection then clicked.  This is the image I saw when my eyes were opened. Cliff Palace at Mesa Verde.  This is where Pueblo people lived about a thousand years ago.  I have dozens and dozens of pictures like it.  In some ways this one seems about right for tonight.  Houses. Kivas.  A large city with no one in sight. 

That's kind of the dichotomy of my life. I spend my days with 380 other people.  Then I go home to an empty house.  It's beautiful, like this is.  It's filled with nooks and crannies, like this is too.  Cliff Palace and Dellwood Road.  Quiet.  Not lifeless, not in ruins, but empty.  It my home past its prime?  Does it indicate a future of solitude?  A sign of abandonment?  A place people like to visit -- tour about in fascination -- but do not want to stay put?  A place left behind when something better came into being?  I am not sure.

I stood above Cliff Palace for an hour this summer.  I stared down into the village.  Counted the kivas.  Imagined where I might have lived if I had been hardy enough to live in this era (I am not).  I was in awe of it.  And maybe tonight, I should just do the same thing with my life, and my quiet nights.  Step back.  Take the long view.  Stare down into what's there with wonder and curiosity.  Look at it through the lens of beauty.  Mesa Verde -- the table green.  Dellwood -- a small wooded valley.  Cliff Palace -- a home to many.  My place -- a home to me.




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